The Online Therapist

MAY 27, 2025

Welcome to "Therapy Shorts," a collection of quick insights and gentle nudges to help you along your healing journey. These posts, published twice per week with audio, provide bite-sized wisdom to help you grow and discover yourself. Join me as we investigate the small ways we can bring peace, clarity, and connection into our lives.

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The Online Therapist

MAY 25, 2025

Because their sense of identity, worth, and safety has been shaped around the emotional needs and behaviours of others, codependents frequently experience an intense need for other people. The onset of this condition typically occurs during childhood, particularly in households where emotional neglect, addiction, mental illness, or inconsistent caregiving were present.

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The Online Therapist

MAY 18, 2025

The emotional and mental toll of being close to a vulnerable narcissist can be substantial. Narcissists who are vulnerable do not project an air of superiority, charisma, or confidence that their more overtly narcissistic counterparts do. On the contrary, they tend to come across as timid, sensitive, nervous, or even self-deprecating. This approachable demeanour has the power to captivate those around them, particularly those with a compassionate nature, a nurturing spirit, or a deep longing to

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The Online Therapist

MAY 11, 2025

The final recognised stage is considered to be the mature love stage, where theoretically we have got to know everything we need to about our partner and have chosen them for the long term. It should be a time when there are no surprises, life is settled, the couple have gone through ups and downs, career building and children. They should, theoretically, be in tune with each other and the plans on the table.

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The Online Therapist

MAY 4, 2025

Narcissists are very choosy. They choose their victims carefully and their choice is usually based on such things as status, wealth, influence or ability. The victims are usually attractive and popular. The more of this the victim has, the greater the value of the supply for the narcissist.

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The Online Therapist

APRIL 27, 2025

Despite so many people identifying with the symptoms, there are still some who doubt its existence or hold derogatory views against anyone claiming to be codependent. This includes virtually all of the medical profession and indeed, some therapists.

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Group therapy 130

The Online Therapist

APRIL 21, 2025

Cozolino conveys a profound sense of optimism about the potential for transformation and healing through neuroplasticity.

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The Online Therapist

APRIL 10, 2025

Codependency recovery is deeply personalbut it doesnt have to be done alone. In fact, group therapy has the potential to transform the healing journey in profound ways. While individual therapy offers valuable insight, something truly powerful happens when people come together with shared experiences and open hearts.

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Group therapy 130

The Online Therapist

APRIL 6, 2025

Codependency isnt a flawits a survival response wired deep in your nervous system. Based on Louis Cozolinos neuroscience research, this post unpacks how early relationships shape your patternsand how to finally rewire them for love that feels safe, mutual, and real. Healing is possibleand it starts within.

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The Online Therapist

MARCH 30, 2025

I wanted to send a clear message: That codependents arent sick. They dont need pills or diagnosing. I wanted to make it very clear that recovery is very much in the hands of the codependent and that recovery starts and finishes with the codependent. Codependency is behavioural and learned from the environment we grew up in and it can be unlearnt. The only recovery from codependency is to find and maintain the individual within.

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The Online Therapist

MARCH 16, 2025

Those of us who battle with self-assurance may find ourselves drawn to someone who is aggressive. Someone who is disciplined may give us solace in the event that we are lacking structure. In the beginning, these characteristics might make us feel excited and complementary. It seems as if the other person "completes" us. This usually happens in the honeymoon period.

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The Online Therapist

MARCH 9, 2025

There is a notable shift towards more flexible, less traditional interpersonal dynamics, in which people value personal fulfillment over society standards. Today's relationships are more adaptable, digital, and self-centered, emphasizing personal development and emotional freedom above strict structures. These shifts represent a deeper shift in how individuals see love, intimacy, and commitment in the modern era.

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The Online Therapist

DECEMBER 28, 2024

The years roll on quicker as you get older but with that comes more wisdom and security. I always tend to look back over a year and compare it to where I was the same time, the prior year. A useful exercise that can reveal progress made (or not).

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The Online Therapist

JANUARY 5, 2025

I have sometimes been criticized for being very cynical about relationships. Stuck in the same old mindset, said someone recently. Still, I would love to see my cynicism about certain aspects of the way we behave in relationships cracked open.

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The Online Therapist

JANUARY 18, 2025

As an imperfect human, I have had my share of troubles in all aspects of life including relationships, business and on a personal level: Ive made decisions and done things that have hurt other people and I havent always been the best partner, son, brother, friend or father.

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Cognitive Behavioral Therapy 130

The Online Therapist

JANUARY 25, 2025

Failure should be our teacher, not our undertaker. Failure is delay, not defeat. It is a temporary detour, not a dead end. Failure is something we can avoid only by saying nothing, doing nothing, and being nothing.

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The Online Therapist

FEBRUARY 1, 2025

At its core, rethinking relationships means embracing the beauty of individualityboth our own and that of our partners. True connection doesnt come from losing ourselves in another person but from standing confidently beside them, growing independently while sharing our journey. By fostering self-awareness, open communication, and mutual respect, we create relationships that thrive not on dependence, but on appreciation.

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Self-awareness 130

The Online Therapist

FEBRUARY 7, 2025

In the end, therapy is not just about understanding the past but about creating meaningful change in the present moment. While awareness is a crucial first step, it must be followed by action otherwise, we risk remaining stuck in old patterns.

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Cognitive Behavioral Therapy 130

The Online Therapist

FEBRUARY 14, 2025

I read a lot of self-help books and they are mostly all the same. Change your thinking and change your life. However, there is one book that I have returned to many times. It is not technically in the self-help genre, more technical, but it holds information essential to understanding how we see relationships.

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The Online Therapist

FEBRUARY 21, 2025

Men consume pornography for a variety of reasons, including biological, psychological, and societal effects. A strong sex drive, fuelled by testosterone, can result in frequent sexual thoughts and cravings, making pornography an appealing outlet.

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Cognitive Behavioral Therapy 130

The Online Therapist

FEBRUARY 24, 2025

We are all individuals, formed from different experiences and we often judge our compatibility on how we see our new partner in the early stages of a relationship. In this phase, our incompatibility is hidden by our need to connect and is driven chiefly by hormones (sometimes repetition compulsion)and brain chemical, not common sense.

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The Online Therapist

MARCH 4, 2025

Join me for a live Q&A where well dive into all things codependency, relationships, and breaking free from destructive habits. Whether you're just starting to recognize unhealthy patterns or deep into your healing journey, this session is for you. Struggling with a romantic partner, family dynamics, or friendships? Bring your questionsthis is your space to ask, learn, and grow.

Family dynamics 173

Family dynamics 173